So - you're waiting. Maybe you're doing and international adoption and you're waiting to get your I600A form approved. Or maybe you are waiting for your referral. Or maybe you're hoping to adopt domestically and you're waiting to be chosen by a prospective birth mother. Or maybe you're waiting for your first foster placement...or you have a placement and you're waiting to see if it becomes permanent.

Ever heard of the saying "a watched pot never boils?" If all you do is fret and moan about when it's going to happen it will probably never happen. There's a lot of waiting in the adoption... more

No, this is not your ob/gyn speaking. It is me, Adrienne, advising you - the person hoping to adopt, perhaps in process, perhaps trying hard to make one of the biggest decisions of your life - to take a deep breath. Relax. Give it some time.

The other day I posted about how my life seemed to be falling apart. Twelve straight days of doing full-time childcare (when I'm used to my kids being in school for at least part of the day) was what did it to me. I also realized that at the same time school... more

How much more are we going to have to go through before we get our placement? ACK!!!

First, having to take care of my grandmother 24/7 is draining my resources...all of them...mentally, financially, physically, and emotionally.

THEN, because we can't go home, it's literally "hairing over" because all it is right now is one big cat kennel. All we have time to do is go home and change the litter box and give the cats about 5 minutes of of lovins, then go right back to grandmas.

Then, I turned down a job because I was promised a job at the other place...well,... more

Sorry to all of you in advance for this "mini-vent".

As you all know, I type while the emotion is felt... while it's "real".

So, here goes...

Hubby and I will be new parents. We are willing to foster/adopt ages 0 to 9, and sibling group size of 2 to 4.

I am Native American, so even more, that qualifies us to adopt Native American children.

Our homestudy was approved on January 10, 2006...and we're STILL waiting?

Our shelter cannot house any more children. The foster families' beds are COMPLETELY FULL.

And we're... more

Anyone else out there with their homestudy freshly done, and waiting on the call?

Do you DREAM about your future child? What you want to do with them when you finally have them?

Do you find yourselves engaged in talk about "x", and looking down the aisles of the baby department, or actually going to a baby store?

Hopefuls...now, it's not a question of IF we become mommys and daddys, it's WHEN.

The waiting is AWFUL...that's when I began to dare to dream about our future children.

It's EASY to look at the easy stuff...like taking them to the stores and... more

Good grief. So much for the "you'll be lucky to even make it through one staffing without a match" that our social worker told us at the start of the February staffing.

Well, we've made it through the February staffing, and 1/2 through the March staffing now...NO kids. :(

For those of you that do not know what a staffing is...this is for foster/adopt families.

Each month, our social worker goes to a meeting with all the other social workers in the state, and learn of the new children that are listed that need a home.

My social worker knows what Tony and... more

Now I am slowly, but SURELY learning about the emotional "roller coaster ride" that a hopeful adoptive parent goes through waiting for their child to get here.

Everyone ALWAYS says "take care of yourself...not much longer and you will not be able to do so anymore". That's all well and good, but my husband and I have PASSED that 2 months ago. *smiles*

Well, as you know, we were CRUSHED to receive news that the group of 4 children we were hoping for and had even MET were not selected for our family.

That day, I told my husband (Tony), I will NEVER... more

Oh gosh, it is SO hard to be a hopeful. Much less a hopeful in waiting.

So, what can you do, as a hopeful in waiting?

If you have had your homestudy, and expecting an infant...go ahead and buy some clothes. Get the nursery ready. Take all that pent up energy and create things for your new little bundle of joy.

If you're expecting an older child, and you're not fostering them, it's kind of hard to buy clothes, naturally. However, you can still get a room ready, and then get the bed and headboard, toys, etc.

Now, if you have not had your homestudy done,... more

"In the Adoption Process, Waiting is the code word for FOREVER"--Kristi H, 2005

It is true. The waiting process is the hardest, and most usually, the longest part for an adoptive family to endure.

I have heard of people being as lucky as being matched with a birth mother 3 months after finalizing their paperwork, to couples going through social services waiting for up to 2 years before being matched.

A lot of things contribute to this wait:

The method of adoption. The age and gender of child(ren) you select. Your social worker/agency. Having a good biography (life book).

In domestic... more