On this blog, I frequently harp on the topic of keeping your integrity when entering into an adoption arrangement with an expecting mother. The reason for this is the frequency with which I read comments such as this one, which was posted on Closed Adoption: Pros and Cons:

open adoptions are not all cracked up to be what they sound like..i went through an agency to put my baby up for adoption, i figured since they were friends of my employer they would be true... more

In my last post, "Perfect" Adopted Child and "Perfect" Adoptive Parent, I addressed some comments posted by Erin on my blog. I would like to address another issue that she raises in this excerpt:

Too often, I see parents choosing a child because they are cute and as young as possible and parents who want a child who will be highly intelligent with no medical, developmental, or behavioral needs. – Erin from Adopted... more

On my post, Adopted Children Come with No Warranty, a reader wrote the following comment:

I often wonder if parents ever consider that they may not be the quality of parents that the child would choose for him/herself if the child had the opportunity to choose. Too often, I see parents choosing a child because they are cute and as young as possible and parents who want a child who will be highly intelligent with no medical, developmental, or behavioral needs. However,... more

On my post, How Often to Adoptive Parents Get Pregnant?, a reader posted the following comment:

As someone who is CHOOSING to adopt (we already have a young bio son and no fertility issues), it drives me crazy when people say things like, "Watch, when you bring your kids home from Ethiopia you'll end up having another one of your own!" The assumptions people make are astounding. It's sad that so many people see adoption as some sort of desperate second... more

On my post, Sliding Scale for Adoption Based Upon Adopted Child's Race, a reader posted the following comment:

Somewhat off topic, but is it weird that I am annoyed with these agency websites I am looking at referring to an expectant mother as a birthmother? – Chromesthesia at Sliding Scale for Adoption Based Upon Adopted Child's Race

I... more

On my last post, Are Portrayals of Adoptive Parents on Television Realistic?, Coley, our Crisis Pregnancy and Open Adoption blogger, asked the following in the comments:

Is there any kind of statistic as to how often that really happens? Adoptive parents adopt then get pregnant?? General society talks like it happens often but from the adoptive parents I know it happens very little...

Just... more

In my last post, Are Portrayals of Birthmothers on Television Realistic?, I talked about the unrealistic portrayal of birthmothers on various television shows. In this post, I will focus on the portrayal of adoptive parents.

I know many adoptive parents, and none of them are like most of the adoptive parents I have seen on television. Let's start with Mary Alice, the narrator on Desperate Housewives who killed her son's birthmother, chopped up her body, stuffed... more

In my last post, Adoption: Separating Reality from Fantasy, I talked about how the portrayal of adoption on television and in movies was very different from reality. In this post, I would like to focus specifically on the portrayal of birthmothers.

Just last week, Desperate Housewives covered this topic with teenager Danielle, who placed her baby with her mother, Bree (the baby's grandmother), to raise as her own child. (Bree has been faking her pregnancy, so her friends will not... more

Before I decided to adopt, I did not know much about adoption. I had a few acquaintances throughout my life who were part of the adoption triad, but I did not know any of them well enough to talk about adoption in detail. Most of what I knew about adoption came from the movies and television, so I had a lot to learn when I decided to adopt.

The only adoptions I had ever heard of were closed. I was floored when our adoption agency talked about meeting the expecting mother and... more

On my post, Deciding to Adopt a Child: Loving Adopted Child, a reader posted the following comment:

It seems like a lot of times folks don't have that EXPLOSIVE SUDDEN LOVE for a child they have just adopted (or given birth to) and they worry that it will never happen, but it's different with everyone. Is it easier to bond initially with a baby or with an older child? – Chromesthesia from Deciding... more