Some hopeful adoptive parents choose to adopt children who are very close in age (under 9 months apart) who are not biologically related. This process is called artificial twinning, and many in the adoption world discourage it.

Pros

Many hopeful adoptive couples seek to adopt artificial twins through international adoption. Because there are so many children waiting to be adopted internationally, finding two children close in age to adopt is not hard to do (assuming the children's birth country allows artificial twinning). By adopting two children at one time, the cost of the two adoptions is less expensive than adopting one at a time due to only having to travel once.

If you adopt two children close in age, they will likely move through life at the same stage of development, which has its benefits. They can share clothes, toys, and friends. They have a built-in playmate who is more likely to be interested in the same things (versus two children who are several years apart in age).

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Cons

The reason that many people in the adoption world discourage artificial twinning is because it is taxing on the new parents. While I do not have friends with artificial twins, I do have friends with biological twins who tell me that parenting twins is very hard work.

Parents of twins deal with issues that parents of non-twin siblings do not. They must have two of everything at the same time versus being able to use hand-me-downs. They must decide whether to keep the twins together or split them up in school. Issues arise when one twin is invited to a birthday party while the other is not. Just imagine paying for two in college!

One friend's biggest challenge was being a new mother of twins. Going from no children to two was so overwhelming that the first three months of her children's lives is just a blur in her memory. If they were both crying at the same time, she could not just choose the one who was "new." Both were "new," and both needed to bond with mom. She experienced a lot of guilt because she could not always take care of both of their needs at the same time. When you have an "established" child who has already bonded with you, you can chose the "new" one. However, when they are both "new," how do you set your priority?

I, personally, would not recommend artificial twinning. Each "new" child to your home needs one-on-one bonding time with mom. When you adopt biological twins, they have an established relationship that is comforting, but two biologically unrelated children of the same age do not have that established bond. Instead, they just wind up halving the time and energy available in a new household. That being said, some families have successfully adopted artificial twins, so you need to do what is best for your family.

Related Topics:

• Artificial twinning - pros and cons (Hoping to Adopt blog)



• Artificial twinning: pros and cons (Russia Adoption blog)



• Artificial Twinning: A Good Idea?

Photo credit: Faith Allen