This post is part of a series on older child adoption in which I am applying things I learned from adopting a retired racing greyhound to hoping to adopt an older child. While there are obviously many differences, I learned a lot that can be useful in adopting an older child.

When you adopt a retired racing greyhound, the rescue spends a lot of time talking about the dog's life before he enters your home. My dog spent 22+ hours a day living in a small crate next to many other greyhounds. He was let out of his crate 3 or 4 times a day to use the bathroom, to train, and to run after a mechanical rabbit. He had only walked on sand or grass, not asphalt or carpet. He had never seen a staircase, door, or window, and he had likely never seen a child or another breed of dog before. My life with a husband, child, and beagle in a carpeted house in suburbia might as well have been on the moon from the dog's perspective. Nothing would be familiar to him.

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As part of your home study, you should have a similar conversation about the life of your child before he joins your home. Whether he is currently living in a foster home or in an orphanage in another country, his life is likely to be very different from the life that you have to offer. A child who grew up in an abusive household is likely to find your safe household as foreign as my dog found my home to be. Even though moving to your home is an improvement, it is unfamiliar, which is scary to a child.

The contrast can be even greater for a child who has been living in a different country. It is possible that he, too, has never seen carpet or stairs. The sights, sounds, and smells are likely to be very different. Even the taste of the food you prepare is likely to be vastly different.

The more you understand about your child's life before joining your family, the better able you will be to help him adjust to his new life. You will want to enable him to have something familiar so it will not feel like everything he has ever known is now gone.

Related Blogs:

• Older Child Adoption blog


• International Adoption blog

Photo credit: Rosanne Mooney