From International Adoption: How to Choose a Country:

10. Decide which country is the best fit for your family.

If you have followed the process laid out in International Adoption: How to Choose a Country, then you have probably already narrowed down your selection of countries. If you are still torn between two or three countries, then figure out which one is the best fit for your family.

To which country do you really feel drawn? Which country most closely meets your needs regarding travel, cost, and ethics? Go with the country that feels like the best fit.

If you are truly torn between two or three countries, my advice is to write out a pro-con list for each country. I have used pro-con lists to help me make several big decisions in my life. To make a pro-con list, fold a sheet of paper in half to make a crease down the middle; then, write Pros on top of the left column and Cons on the top of the right column. Be sure to write the country’s name on the top of the list so you can remember which country you are evaluating with each list.

Brainstorm every possible pro and con, no matter how silly or insignificant each item might seem. Be sure to include the things already discussed in this series, such as travel, cost, and ethics.

As you fill out your pro-con lists, you will likely begin to see that one country stands out. Sometimes we are subconsciously leaning in one direction, but it takes writing down all of the reasons why we want to go in one direction for us to realize that we have already made a decision.

After you finish your brainstorming session, review the lists and see if one country clearly outweighs the others. If not, then “weight” each item on the lists. For example, assign 10 points for the big items like travel or cost but only 1 point for small things like getting to eat authentic Chinese food while traveling.

Be sure to save your pro-con lists and put them in your child’s life book. Your child will probably get a kick out of how you decided which country to choose.

Related Topics:

• How to decide to adopt internationally



• How to evaluate adoption options



• How to Evaluate the Different Types of Adoption



• Choose a Country



• International Adoption blog