For me, one of the most frustrating parts of waiting to adopt was not being able to make plans. I have always been a very “scheduled” person. I plan everything out in advance. One of my friends says I am like “Rabbit” from “Winnie the Pooh” – I live and die by my schedule. For 17 months, I was in “wait mode,” so I was afraid to make plans. Should we go out of town for Christmas? What if the baby comes? Should I buy tickets to next month’s concert? What if I have a baby and cannot go?

I even let the wait for a baby affect my career. I always planned to be a stay-at-home mom, so I was on “short-term” mode at work. I loved my job and was very good at it, but I passed up opportunities for advancement because I was going to get pregnant any day now and then quit to raise my child. I did not want my manager to invest in training me only to have me leave. As the weeks turned into months and then years, I realized what a mistake I had made. Instead of being with this company for a few months, I was there for 4 years. Fortunately for me, my manager promoted me, anyhow. I started a new career in writing – a career that I LOVE – and I have continued to use these skills even after becoming a mother. Writing is something that can be done from home and on a part-time basis. If my manager had not pushed me, I would have stayed in a dead-end position and lost out on a fabulous opportunity.

Don’t make the same mistakes that I did. Continue on with your life. Advance in your career. Make your travel plans. If your child comes along sooner than you expect, then you will be happy to have to cancel plans to parent your child. But in the meantime, don’t put your life on hold. This time in your life matters, too.