e-mail
For the next series, we will discuss how to survive waiting for your child without losing your mind. For me, waiting to be matched was the single most difficult part of becoming a parent. When I was going through infertility treatments, there was always something that I needed to be doing. When I was applying to adopt and then going through the home study process, there was always something that I needed to be doing. By doing something, I felt like I was working toward becoming a mom. While I was waiting to be matched, there was NOTHING to do except to wait…and wait…and wait.
I am a doer. I always have been. It is not in my nature to sit back and do nothing, and yet that is exactly what I had to do for 17 months as I waited to be matched with my son’s birthmother. This was a very difficult time in my life. You can read more about my own personal experience with waiting at Surviving the Wait. I spent this time moving in and out of depression. I eventually developed some tools to help me make it through this very difficult time. I have since developed additional tools to help me through the challenging times in my life. I will share these tools with you in a Top Ten List of things to do while waiting. I will explain each tool in detail because this is a very important topic for those of you who are waiting to meet your child.
After working through the Top Ten List, we will talk about other issues that you will confront during your wait time. For example, getting through Mother’s Day and Christmas were particularly hard challenges for me. We will talk about strategies for getting through those times as well as other challenges that you might encounter while you are in the waiting mode.
The most important thing to remember is that the waiting period does not last forever. This time WILL end, and it will eventually become a distant memory. Rather than wishing away the waiting time, there are things that you can do to make those months or years a positive time in your life. Those days are going to pass whether you are miserable or not, and you don’t get that time back. So, rather than resigning yourself to a period of misery, consider trying some of the strategies offered in this blog.
