Luckily, you had access to birth control, so were not completely powerless.

Great post Adrienne, I think it is important for us to try to put ourselves in others' shoes!

Luckily, you had access to birth control, so were not completely powerless.

That's true. And I've always exercised that power. But I *did* find myself in an unplanned pregnancy at 30 despite that, so I know it can happen. At that time, however, I was married and planning on children so it was not a bad thing, just a surprise thing.

Regarding birth control giving you power - you can still get pregnant while on birth control. I did.

"How does it get on young women's radar, anyway?"

--Advertising ("Pregnant? Scared?")
--Family pressure
--the Internet (profiles of hopeful parents)
--Doctors recommending lawyers or faciliators
--desire to please (trying to make some other couple's dreams come true while regaining your good girl image)
--feeling you can't abort, but aren't sure if you can parent, either
--in some cases, the sincere belief that your child needs a different home

Well, Adrienne, there's more to consider in this equation other than your age...the year a young unmarried girl finds herself pregnant is very significant. So, from my perspective, I find it interesting that your musings were thought of with a choice...you asked, ‘what would I do if....?’ But if you had become pregnant when I did, in 1969, you wouldn’t have been able to ask that question.

If you had gotten pregnant in the years between 1940 and 1973 (I realize you are too young for this to have happened but play along with me....)you wouldn’t have had the luxury of choosing what you’d want to do. Roe vs. Wade had not been decided, the choice to have a baby or not to have a baby was not afforded to the women in this country. Plus, the choice to keep your baby or not was also not afforded to the overwhelming, vast majority of young women who were unmarried and pregnant. If government funding was available to help a young girl keep and support her baby it was never offered to those of us who had gotten pregnant while still in high school.

People say we chose to put our children up for adoption but that just isn’t so. I was never given a choice. When I was sent to the adoption agency for counseling I was NEVER asked what I wanted to do, I was TOLD that the best thing for my baby was to put it up for adoption. I was TOLD, “You’ll forget this baby and you’ll go on to have other babies when you are older and married.” I was TOLD that IF I really loved my baby I’d want it to have a mother AND a father, IF I really loved my baby I’d do the right thing, IF I really loved my baby I’d put it up for adoption. I was told what to do, I was never asked. If I voiced my maternal feelings they were dismissed as the rambling’s of an inexperienced, naive child. I was given no impartial council, nor was I given any legal council.
The trauma of having my baby taken from me created a fear of pregnancy so deeply ingrained within me that it prevented me from ever getting pregnant again and I never forgot my baby, never.

So consider yourself extremely lucky to have the perspective of a woman with a choice, for having no choice irrevocably changed the entire course of my life.